Measurements Re-defined

June 8, 2008

Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter:

Eskimo Pi

.

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital:

1 I. V. League

.

2000 pounds of Chinese soup:

Won ton

.

1 millionth mouthwash:

1 microscope

.

Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier:

Mach Turtle

.

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:

Knot-furlong

.

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it’s less filling:

1 lite year

.

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:

1 Rod Sterling

.

Half of a large intestine:

1 semicolon

.

1000 aches:

1 megahurtz

.

Weight an evangelist carries with God:

1 billigram

.

Basic unit of laryngitis:

1 hoarsepower

.

Shortest distance between two jokes:

A straight line

.

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:

Bananosecond

.

A Half-Bath:

1 demijohn

.

453.6 graham crackers:

1 pound cake

,

Given the old adage "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step," the first step of a one-mile journey:

1 Milwaukee

.

1 million microphones:

1 megaphone

.

2 million bicycles:

2 megacycles

.

365.25 days:

1 unicycle

.

 2200 mockingbirds:

Two kilomockingbirds

. 

10 cards:

1 decacards

.

1 kilogram of falling figs:

1 Fig Newton

.

1000 grams of wet socks:

1 literhosen

.

1 millionth of a fish:

1 microfiche

.

1 trillion pins:

1 terrapin

.

1 million billion picolos:

1 gigolo

.

10 rations:

1 decoration

.

100 rations:

1 C-ration

.

10 millipedes:

1 centipede

.

3 1/3 tridents:

1 decadent

.

10 monologs:

5 dialogs

.

5 dialogs:

1 decalog

.

2 monograms:

1 diagram

.

8 nickels:

2 paradigms

.

2 wharves:

1 paradox

.

100 Senators:

Not 1 decision

Posted in Fun Stuff - Cartoons, Loretta's Line